he sun was beginning to set when the platter of soup and barley was set down before the Duke. Thomas reclined at his table stiffly, freshly dressed in blue tunic and hose, the azure seams speckled with sapphires. There was a scent of peaches in the air from when he’d bathed a few hours back, soaking his fur in the rich fragrances and oils necessary to clean it presentably. About his hooves he wore the thick woolen socks to soften their blow upon the masonry, though for the last few hours he’d only trod upon the carpets of his chambers as he examined all of his things once more.
“I am not wholly myself,” he said at long last, once the servant had slipped silently out the door again. Both Malisa and Thalberg had joined him at his table, though they had each ate something different. A platter of stew awaited the Prime Minister while the Steward feasted upon fish caught fresh from the river that morning. “I can remember these last few months still, but some things are hazy and strange.”
Thalberg frowned as he gulped down a chunk of haddock. “Do you remember what it was like being the horse?”
Thomas frowned, a loaf of bread halfway to his muzzle. “Yes, I do. I can still remember...” he paused then, his voice trailing off into inaudible whispering. His eyes scanned past them, and seemed a mix of emotions, melancholy, anger, and painful regret, all rolled into one. He stiffened and set the bread down for a moment. “I still remember it, yes. I cannot describe to you what these last few months have been like for me. All I can say is that I just felt this inexplicable yearning to be nothing but a horse. I apologize for the things I said to you both during that time. I did not wish to burden either of you more than you already were.”
Thomas lowered his head then. “And I certainly did not wish to burden you with acts that you felt were treasonous.”
Malisa reached across the table and clasped his hand. “Father, there are some burdens that we do not wish to bear. Those are the heaviest of all. But a burden we take on willingly can never bear us down. You are not only the Duke, you are also our friend, and,” she smiled lightly then, “something more. You need not apologize for what happened. It was not your doing.”
Thomas smiled back to her and nodded. He sat up straighter then, ears erect. He tore off a bit of the bread and placed it in his muzzle. He chewed a few times and swallowed. “Yes, you are right. Still, you say that this was a plot of our enemy? That they used Bryonoth to try and make me a beast? Why would they do that?”
“George thinks it is to create chaos here. If so, they have succeeded, but not for long. We’ve learned a great deal about them because of their failed attempt. More than we would have ever known without it, I begrudgingly admit.”
“We will need to have a council session to discuss all of these implications. I have not been myself for too long. I have been... Toumoth.” He said the last with a strange whimsy. “I cannot explain it though. There was something peaceful about being simply a horse. I suppose all animals feel this, as they have little else to trouble them.”
“An animal knows only what its body needs,” Thalberg replied, his voice sotto. “If it has that, it is satisfied. A man needs far more, your grace. A leader needs far more. A people need far more than an animal can provide.”
Thomas finished off the remainder of the bread and surveyed his friend for several seconds, his chestnut eyes, the same colour as they had been when he’d been Toumoth, though showing far more intelligence. “You are right, my friend.” He reached one hand and drew a thick finger down across his cheek. “Do you know I can still feel its touch here? It’s no longer in my mind, but I doubt I’ll ever forget how it felt.”
“I doubt if there was ever a man who has gone through what you have experienced, Father,” Malisa replied, her own voice still filled with relief, though there was an uncertain edge to it. “We are here for you. Metamor is here waiting for you to take your place again.”
The Duke nodded, setting his spoon in the soup. “Aye. Andwyn’s replacement for me, Leofe, was a pleasant chap, but he was not me. I could see it immediately.”
“And Andwyn says he is happy that he no longer has to pretend to be you,” Malisa said, her smile emerging as she skewered a chunk of beef on her fork. “Andwyn also says that he thinks a public appearance by you tomorrow will go a long way to quelling any rumours that may have started.”
Thomas stopped the spoon halfway to his muzzle. “Have any rumours started?”
Thalberg grunted. “None that he has mentioned. Well, any to do with you, Thomas. He has said that some have noticed Bryonoth’s absence.”
Thomas put the spoonful of broth in his muzzle and drank it down. “And what are we going to say about that? What will she say?”
“That she was in seclusion, contemplating her place at Metamor, and what the curse has done to her,” Malisa replied, a familiar curl to her lips. His adoptive daughter still did not like speaking about what the curse had done to her too. “She comes out of course when she knows that you will reinstate her as a knight in full, and even offer her a place amongst the Order of the Red Stallion.”
Thomas nodded slowly as he spooned another mouthful down. “Truly? So she is innocent then in this?”
The alligator nodded. “Apparently. We met the man truly responsible. You might remember it.”
This made Thomas set down his spoon and nodded, his flesh trembling. “Aye. The man in black. Zagrosek. I remember seeing him now. Damn, I remember hoping that he would succeed. Ah, I don’t know if I could ever forgive myself for that.”
“It was not your fault,” Malisa assured him, her voice comforting to hear. Though, it was still not quite right. Another voice would be far more soothing to him. “The magic of the halter affected your mind, forcing a completely different personality upon you. You were no more responsible than Bryonoth was. Zagrosek had a direct link to her somehow. And when we’d discovered what a danger she was, he tore out part of her spirit to remove it. If any have suffered worse than you, it is she.”
Thomas frowned, but kept his posture firm and stiff. “True. I will extend a personal invitation to her to join the Red Stallion.” He sipped from his goblet, staring across the edge at his friends. “I want to thank you both for everything you did to save me. If not for you, I would be grazing right now in a stable or on a field somewhere, and would be doing that the rest of my life. That night you came to stop her, that night, through her Zagrosek would have completely bound the halter to me. I would have been a horse then, for the rest of my life.”
Malisa nodded gravely, exchanging a glance with the Steward. Thalberg’s yellow eyes narrowed in displeasure. “We had wondered why that man had come to Metamor on that night. I suppose we know now.”
Thalberg set down his own goblet then and lowered his head slightly. “Your grace, you have no idea the pleasure it gives me to see you sit at this table and eat. To see you sit here and converse with us as we have so often in the past. Just to see you, dressed, walking and talking as a man again, it is the greatest gift I have ever received. I... I cannot express to you the depth of my joy.” When Thalberg lifted his head again, Thomas could have sworn that the alligator actually shed a tear.
“It is... it is good to be a man again,” Thomas said, smiling warmly then, before laughing amidst a shower of his own tears. Reaching across the table, he gripped the lapels of their collar sand pulled both his friends around to his side of the table. There, in a display of emotion that none had ever dared confess, they hugged tightly together for several long moments.
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