I've been trying to drag myself out of this depressive slump lately. Strange my depression is, not so much feeling sad all the time, but feeling empty, disoriented and numb, with punctuated periods of extreme uncontrollable excitement for seconds at a time. But you can't help me about that, since you have never treated someone experiencing similar psychological problems. The only people who can help me cost $110 an hour and are indistinguishable from the bad therapists. I try to help myself, but honestly sometimes I just wish there were someone to take care of me, to give me advice when giving myself advice doesn't work.
Yea that'll be the day. I calculated the cost of going to a low cost, unprestigious school I've had my eye on this morning at 3:30am. It was US$18,000 per year, assuming I can find a place that's $800/month to stay at, and assuming I only eat rice and beans. It's so sad, where am I supposed to get that money? Loans? I'd rather not have fat business execs laughing all the way to the bank as I spend my life paying them interest. I'd only consider a loan if it would produce a lucrative degree, like law. business, or medical. All three of which are NOT nice indeed.
If I got half of the above $18000 paid somehow then I could go through school, provided I worked 5 hours a day, 5 days a week, every week of the year including when I am in school. And provided I keep my job the whole time. So pretty much I am still denied my education, since jobs don't last that long, pay that much, and take up time I would need for studying. Welcome to the land of opportunity, may I take your order? Ooh, I'm quotin' that.
So here's something interesting... a local ISP. Of course there's no hope that they're fiscally sound enough to hire people, much less people without college degrees, but what else am I supposed to do? I already proved I can't handle the pace and psychological warfare of a fast food place.
Why is it 4am and I'm still up. Why oh why... I'm so tired from 7 hours of sleep day after day... but how else to get to bed on time? Sighs...